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26Apr09

(Couldn’t think of an apt title)

My mind races, my body aches.  I find it mildly funny and ironic that my happy place right now is the gym. I get lost with my thoughts there. A place where you tend to be around people, but alone at the same time. A place to think, or a place where you don’t need to think. A place where you can just slap on your earphones and think. Or if your mood suits it, just concentrate on getting that last rep in.

I’m in my usual bout of something.  I can’t think of the proper thing to call it.  Depression? Self-loathing? Quarter-life crisis?  I don’t really know.  I think I’m just tired. Yeah, it’s that usual line again.  Tired of having to show that everything’s ok, that I’m happy, that my life is going where I want it.

For once, I wish I could be as selfish, that I can just stop trying to please everyone.  To just stop thinking about what others might think.

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